


KakaGai One-Shots

by robolife



Category: Naruto
Genre: Boy Next Door AU, Soulmate AU, domestic AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-30
Updated: 2016-04-30
Packaged: 2018-06-05 14:02:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 13,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6707164
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/robolife/pseuds/robolife
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A compilation of all the one-shots I've posted on tumblr for KakaGai, summaries and relevant warnings before each chapter.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. #1

**Author's Note:**

> Set in wartime before the actual series started, non-graphic mention of blood, major character death. Written December 27, 2014.

They were just kids, not even really past puberty yet, so why were they fighting? A sense of duty? Honor? Vengence?

But what did it matter, when the blood of children was spilled? 

Gai didn’t always think this. He used to be full of righteous fury, ready to destroy anyone who tried to harm him and his friends. But he couldn’t save them all. Not even his eternal rival, the ‘genius’ could save them all. 

And Gai couldn’t save him.

He’d seen it. He’d been a second too slow. He’d waited just a moment too long. And now he forced himself to watch blood poured out of the body in his arms, felt it lose heat and lose life.

His mind couldn’t comprehend what was happening. Yes, he knew what was happening. But. It couldn’t be happening, right?

“Kakashi?”

It wasn’t possible. (He saw it happen and he knew his friends had died but it couldn’t be possible, not  _him_ not when Gai wasn’t there not when he didn’t give his all to protect him).

He…he knew what was happening. But his mind wouldn’t allow room for the truth. The truth that had seared itself into his eyes as he arrived, breath wrenching itself from his lungs because he was the reinforcements. He was supposed to be there, he was supposed to  _save_ him. 

But he didn’t.

He took too long before acting on his intuition, took too long getting approval, took too long running through the trees, even if it was as fast as he could go.

He wasn’t fast enough and now his best friend was dying in his arms before he even reached adulthood.

The world was getting blurrier, it was starting to shake. It mixed together the features he knew well but could have known  _so much more_. But the silver hair was stained and matted with gore and the mask was in shreds. The now mismatched eyes that held so much potential and promise were dull and getting duller. 

It was so quiet that when a sound was made he whipped his head around in shock, wondering who could have made it that close without alerting him. But no one was there. The sound came again but this time he realized it was him. 

He was crying.

He was crying because he couldn’t follow his ninja way, even for the person he loved the most.


	2. #2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kakashi disappears for a year and is assumed dead. Implied past violence. Written December 28, 2014.

A whole year he’d been gone, and when he came back it was in the night when Gai couldn’t see.

The last time Gai had seen him he’d been walking by the training grounds, staring at the ground. Gai had, of course, ran up to him with a grin and asked him if he too was enjoying this beautiful morning.

“ _Hm.”_

_Well, that answer wasn’t much, but if that was enough to deter Gai then they wouldn’t be eternal rivals._

_“Ah, so hip and cool! But that doesn’t matter, rival! I haven’t seen you for weeks, what have you been up to?”_

_“Can’t say.”_

_“Well, where are you headed to?”_

_“A mission.”_

_“Oh, really? What kind? I bet you’ll ace it, after all, you are the eternal rival of the one and only green beast of Konoha!"_

_Kakashi finally turned his eye toward him,_ _looking exceptionally tired, "Gai, don’t you have some sort of training to do? I have things to do, and I’m sure you do too.”_

_Gai blinked, taking a step back, “Well…alright, but I’ll see you when you get back, Kakashi!” He gave the silver haired boy a thumbs up, coupled with a smile. Kakashi was gone before he even put his hand back down._

That had been a year ago. They’d all thought he was dead, even if he had only been declared ‘missing’. Genius Kakashi couldn’t just go 'missing’, because he would do everything he could to get back, and it would never take him a year.

Gai had managed to hold out for six months, but even he couldn’t deny the (seemingly) obvious truth after that. It hurt, more than he let on, to think that he would never see his rival again, never be able to tell him 'you’re my best friend’, never be able to make sure he knew how much he meant.

There was still a hole in part of his heart, he wasn’t sure if it would ever go away. 

He had thrown himself into training, vowing that he would get stronger, he wouldn’t let another friend die. He’d gotten taller, too, finally hitting his growth spurt, resembling his father more and more each day. He was proud of that, but sometimes, in the dead of night, he wondered if Kakashi would have gotten taller too, if he would look like his father, if Gai would even have been able to tell or if it would be hidden under the mask.

Tonight was one of those nights, Gai had just returned from a mission and his body was sore all over, but his mind wouldn’t let him sleep. He stared up into the inky blackness of his ceiling, letting his thoughts turn melancholy for all of two moments before he frowned, forcing his eyes shut and willing himself to go to sleep.

It worked…eventually.

He woke up to the sound of someone pounding on his door. Blinking his eyes open, he got up, looking out the window to see the daylight just starting to seep through. Why would someone be at his door this early? And pounding at it so mercilessly? Curious, and a bit worried, Gai opened his door, revealing a breathless Genma. Seeing his usually calm  teammate looking so anxious immediately put him on edge. He opened his mouth to ask what was wrong but Genma beat him to it.

“Kakashi is back.”

.

.

.

Gai couldn’t do anything but stare, breath caught somewhere in his throat, mouth still halfway open. The only movement was his eyes, widening so much it would have been comical in any other situation. After what seemed an eternity of silence broken only by Genma’s soft pants, he spoke, voice cracking,

“W-what?”

Genma took another breath, looking at him with a serious expression.

“He showed up in the middle of the night, I was on duty and he…he didn’t look good. We took him to the hospital but no one’s been allowed to see him…I just thought you should know.”

Gai’s stomach felt like it was staging a mutiny, his voice was suddenly AWOL, his breath was trapped inside his lungs and his mind was starting to overheat.

Kakashi? How could he be alive, when they’d all accepted him as dead? If he had been alive, then why hadn’t they been out looking for him, why hadn’t he come back, why had they given up.

Why had he come back when Gai had finally given up all tendrils of hope.

The next thing he knew he’d somehow gotten his sandals on and his body out the door- at least he slept in loose pants and a shirt, so it wasn't  _too_ weird- and Genma was shouting after him. But Gai barely registered that, his eyes focused solely on the hospital, intending to see the silver haired youth with his own eyes.

Unfortunately, they wouldn’t let him in, like Genma had tried to warn him. Stil, he wouldn’t be deterred, after all, what sort of person would Maito Gai be if he just left? No, he had to get in somehow, even if that meant checking every single window on the building.

He should probably get dressed first, however.

Once he ate breakfast and dressed, he tried to get the nurses to let him see Kakashi once again. This time he knew them, though, and felt that he had a better chance. The nurse, at first, was still adamant.

“He’s barely conscious, and he’s made it clear he doesn’t want any visitors, nor would I advise him to see any.”

“But surely, he would want to see his eternal rival!”

“I…well…I know you two were close, but I really don’t think you should see him.”

“He’s been gone for a  _year_. It’s hard to even believe he’s not dead. Could you let me see him, just for five minutes…please?” He was grasping at straws now, but he was going to go crazy if they didn’t let him in, and he was already trying to figure out the best way to sneak in. Maybe Ibiki could help him?

Luckily, the nurse seemed to be much more open to his words than the last one, since all he got in response was a sigh and a “No more than five minutes, got it? And remember to be quiet.” However, by the time the last part was said he was already making his way down the hall, a “Thank you!” thrown over his shoulder.

When he finally reached the door it seemed like a weight was suddenly dropped on his body, anchoring him in place. He gulped, the door seeming to grow ten times larger. 

Kakashi was on the other side of that door.

The person he had thought dead and forever beyond reach was on the other side of that door.

Gai was terrified.

He took a deep breath. No. It didn’t matter. His best friend was  _right there_ and he’d be damned if he didn’t see him.

So he forced his hand up and opened the door, he made his legs take him forward to the only bed in the room. He made his eyes look at the living ghost that was staring at him with his own wide one.

The first thing he noticed, out of everything, was that his hair was longer, and duller. Then his eye, since the left one was covered, it had a large bag underneath it, and it looked panicked, like a wild animal’s. He had a surgical mask on in place of his usual mask, and most of what Gai could see of his body was covered in bandages. 

He did notice that the other’s shoulders were broader, his face seemed more angular, and Gai was sure that if he was standing he would be taller.

Of course, those observations were in the back of his mind, since all he could think now was a combination of disbelief, relief, and worry. Kakashi was a mess but he was  _there_ he was  _alive_. Gai felt tears well up in his eyes, he’d stopped in front of the bed, almost afraid that if he got closer he would wake up, that this would all be a dream.

Kakashi was looking at him, eye unreadable and wild, but he had yet to say anything. 

Gai made some sort of strangled noise that caught in his throat, but it broke the silence of the room, and whatever spell had been preventing them from doing anything. 

Gai’s feet moved on their own. For how much they’d wanted to stay rooted to the spot before, they practically ran to the side of the bed. His hands lifted themselves up, he wasn’t sure what they were doing. Kakashi didn’t seem to know what was happening, either, but where Gai had found himself moving, Kakashi seemed to be frozen, staring at Gai, still unreadable. 

His hands reached up, slowly, until they were level with the other’s face, and they reached forward but he managed to regain control before they made contact, freezing them in the air. He heard Kakashi catch his breath, and they were staring at each other. The tears that had welled in Gai’s eyes fell.

And then he couldn’t stop himself, he leaned forward, he pulled the other close, he latched on because he didn’t know if he would disappear again and his heart hurt for a whole different reason. Gai’s body shook as sobs ran through it, and Kakashi had yet to react, but he couldn’t care right now because it was just now sinking in that he was  _alive_ and Gai’s heart was breaking again.

Then he felt arms (too thin) wrap around his back, he became aware of a spot on his shirt that was growing wet and he realized his friend, his best friend, his eternal rival, his very special person had given up too. He’d given up and now that he’d made it through whatever hell he’d been in he didn’t know what to do.

They were both clueless and hopeless but that was okay because now they were together. If they were together they could get through anything.

Then a voice came to his ears that Gai thought he’d never hear again.

“I love you.”

.

They weren’t kids anymore, they weren’t innocent anymore, but that was okay. Because he could touch him again, he wasn’t dead, and that’s all that mattered.


	3. #3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Relatively short fluff scene, pet-centric. Written December 29, 2014.

Kakashi and Gai had just come back from a mission in Sunagakure, and even before entering they both knew something was wrong. First of all their were more barks than there should have been, second of all Pakkun and the others were waiting for them in front. Kakashi looked at him, eyebrow raised in question while Gai cautiously made his way to the door. 

Pakkun seemed about to speak when Gai made some sort of surprised squeal, followed by a thump and an ‘oof’. Kakashi whirled around, expecting some sort of surprise attack only to see a…dog?

This, naturally, took them both by surprise. Not only did the dog not belong to them, but it had barreled Gai down the moment he opened the door, and was now licking at his face. This might have been funny to Konoha’s green beast had it not been for the fact that the dog was as big as he was.

Kakashi, on the other hand, thought it was the funniest shit. He held back any laughter that tried to escape as Gai tried in vain to get the dog off of himself without harming it, but a snort still escaped, earning him a glare from the man on the ground. 

That was when the flood started.

Really, the only thing Kakashi could do was stare in awestruck horror as dogs of all ages and sizes poured out of the doorway. Those…those weren’t his dogs. And Gai, he was still stuck under the giant, and at least half of the dogs coming out decided to stop and crowd around him. Kakashi would have laughed at that, too, had it not been for the other half of the large amount of dogs assaulting him. He had a little more time to guard himself, though, so he didn’t fall to the floor. 

He was knocked against the wall though.

In the end Gai managed to stand up and pry Kakashi away from the multitude of dogs, since the silver haired ninja had elected to pet and coo at them rather than actually do anything. Finally the two turned to Pakkun, expecting an explanation. The only answer the got was, “Someone accidentally set the pound on fire. This is only half of them, the other half went to the Inuzukas.”

After a few weeks most of the dogs were relocated or adopted, but the village never ended up rebuilding the pound. Kakashi and Gai just ended up buying a bigger house.


	4. #4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Celebrating their anniversary through the years, ft. Gai in a wheelchair and blind Kakashi. Written December 30, 2014.

They were in the middle of a war, they were dirty with blood and dirt and sweat, they were dead tired in body and soul. And it was the last time they danced. 

It was late and everyone was exhausted. Kakashi and Gai had just regrouped and defeated the enemy, but there was still a long battle ahead of them. For now, though, the army was resting. Or at least, most of it was.

“Gai, we’re at war, there’s no time for this.”

“Oh? And are you going to be getting any sleep, rival, or are you going to think yourself into exhaustion?”

“…Still-”

He was cut off by Gai giving an exasperated sigh, followed by a look. Kakashi finally gave in, though he didn’t look too sad about it. Gai gave a grin, walking closer.

“You know you won’t get any music.”

“I know.”

“And we have to stay in the tent.”

“I know.”

Gai would not be swayed, beaming at the person he loved as their hands took familiar places and they danced in circles in the confines of the tent. Gai’s smile made it seem like everything would be okay. Kakashi’s look made it seem like Gai was all that was good in the world.

They were both right, in a way. 

They were both wrong, in a way.

It was their anniversary and they were in the middle of the war, but they’d be damned if they didn’t dance.

—

The next time they were alone together was in the hospital. Kakashi was sitting in the visitor’s chair, silently, but for once he wasn’t reading. He wouldn’t be reading for a long time. Gai was in the hospital bed, sleeping off and on, and for once he wasn’t training in the room, pushing his body farther than it should be pushed. He wouldn’t train for a while.

But he would train, because he was Maito Gai and if it didn’t kill him it couldn’t beat him. 

For Kakashi it wasn’t a big deal, he still had his ears and nose, and, more importantly, he still had Gai.

Still.

Gai wouldn’t be walking anymore.

Kakashi wouldn’t be seeing anymore.

They wouldn’t be dancing anymore. 

It wouldn’t stop them from trying, though, and that was enough.

—

One year later and their lives were starting to form again. Gai was back to training again, even if it was in a wheel chair. Kakashi didn’t have anything covering his eyes, and he’d gotten good at giving people blank, dead stares, though sometimes he missed their eyes. 

They were sitting together listening to music when Kakashi spoke.

“What’s wrong?”

“I just…we can’t continue our tradition.”

“Hm? Says who?”

“What? It’s obvious, my leg is crushed, I can’t stand on it, much less dance.”

“I see, so no one has really said we can’t continue our tradition, then?”

“Kakashi.”

“Gai.”

“I can’t dance.”

“I see.”

Gai frowned. No he didn’t, pun aside, it frustrated him everyday that his leg was useless, and this was making the normally happy man infuriated. That was until Kakashi stood up and, after a botched try, grabbed Gai’s hands.

“I’ll admit, it might be a little awkward the first few times.”

“Kakashi, what are you doing?”

“We should probably move the table too.”

“Kakashi.”

He wasn’t listening, he was instead moving the table so there was an open space in the middle of the room, even nudging the chairs and sofa to give them a little more room.

“I hope I don’t forget to put these back.”

“Kakashi, I can’t, why aren’t you-”

He was cut off as Kakashi put a hand on his hip, giving him an expectant look (Gai still forgot his eyes didn’t work sometimes, he was so good at making it seem like they did). Finally Gai gave a sigh and moved farther forward, reluctantly. Kakashi grabbed his hands, standing there for a moment before holding one up and letting go of the other, reaching around to twirl the chair.

“Kakashi, that isn’t dancing.”

“Well, it’s difficult when you’re not doing anything. I would have thought you would be the one trying to dance.”

“But I  _can’t_ dance.”

“Nonsense. You may not be the best dancer but you can do it.”

Gai opened his mouth to tell him, once again, that this was impossible, when he stopped. Wasn’t Kakashi right? Hadn’t Gai given up? Since when did Maito Gai give up? He may be in a wheel chair but he was still the green beast of Konoha. 

His eyes closed, tears threatening to spill forth, but he opened them, a determined look on his face. 

“You’re right.”

“I know.”

“Don’t push it.”

And they danced. It was awkward and difficult and Kakashi’s feet got run over multiple times, but they were both laughing when they stopped, Gai sitting in the chair and Kakashi sitting on the ground. Then Gai slipped himself down, level with the other, who turned his head, confused. 

“Thank you, Kakashi.”

There was a smile. A kiss. And they were happy.

Gai thought the last time he would dance had been that night in the war. But as long as the two of them were together, they would never really stop.


	5. #5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Celebrating New Years. Written December 31, 2014.

Kakashi had never been a fan of New Years. It was just another day, really, so why bother celebrating it? Of course, he had never really found any joy in the coming of the New Year, so that might be it.

He would hole himself up until midnight, reading or sleeping, though it was usually the former. Then he would go stand at the memorial until dawn, the only ‘special’ thing he did for the holiday.

Really, the only thing he was doing was making sure he didn’t forget them as another year began. 

Of course, it became harder to do…well, nothing as he left Anbu and started holding normal hours. Mainly because of Gai. The man seemed hell bent on getting him to go to some party.

He had always celebrated the New Year. 

—

The beginning a new year, the idea of a new start. He and his father had always stayed up, watching the first sunrise of the year. 

_“Gai, as this year’s sun rises, so must you! Become stronger in body and mind, give this year your all!”_

_“Yes!”_

Now he had an addition to his routine, the jōnins always getting together on top of Hokage Mountain, putting back a few beers and counting down until midnight. Most went home after that, either in small groups, pairs, or just by themselves. Gai had always stayed, waiting atop until he saw the sun rise.

Gai always had fun with his comrades, but this year, this year he would make sure  _everyone_ was there.

And that was where he found himself now. Standing in front of a locked door to a very uninviting apartment. It would take more than that to stop him, though. Like the traps set up, but they would only slow him down. 

In the end, it took him ten minutes to get into the apartment, and all he found was Kakashi sprawled on his couch, wearing casual clothes and reading a book. Gai looked at him expectantly. He received a sigh in response.

“I’m not going, Gai.”

“But you aren’t in Anbu anymore, rival! You have no excuse to not come.”

“I don’t see the point in going.”

“To make meaningful connections with your fellow ninja!”

“I’d rather not.”

Gai groaned, this task just might be impossible. However, he wouldn’t give up yet.

“Why don’t you want to go?”

“Because celebrating New Year’s is ridiculous and unnecessary.”

Well, that was hard to answer to. Gai frowned, standing there for a moment before walking up to the other and taking the book away. He got an annoyed look, but that was alright.

“Then why do you always do the same thing the minute the new year start?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“I think you do.”

There was an uncomfortable look, then a sigh.

“I really don’t want to go to a party.”

Gai smiled, pulling his friend to his feet.

“Then we will just wait for sunrise together!”

“Oh really? Where?" 

He wasn’t very enthusiastic, but Gai could more than make up for that himself.

"A mountain would be preferable, but, for you, rival, I will settle with a roof!”

“Oh, how generous.”

Gai beamed at him, dragging him out of the dark apartment and into the night, stopping only to put their shoes on.

Finally they settled on a roof at the edge of the city, overlooking the training grounds and memorial. The sun wouldn’t be up for a few more hours, and they were sure to end up freezing, but for once both of them were fine with just laying there, next to each other on the roof (and if their hands found each other, in that stillness, well, there was no one else to see it), looking up at the infinite cosmos as the new year approached.

And it was new, because it wasn’t loud and full of movement, and it wasn’t dark and full of pain.

It was quiet and full of peace. 

Their traditions changed that year, but neither of them minded all that much.


	6. #6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gai receives a mystery present on his birthday each year. Written Jan 1, 2015.

Every year, without fail, Gai would find a rose on his birthday. He never knew where they came from, and sometimes there were darker spots on them he didn’t want to think about, but he always found himself looking forward to it. He’d long given up on finding out who it was, and by now they mystery was part of the tradition- it would take away from it if he found out. 

It had started after the Third Great Ninja War, a rose placed on top of one of the post he used to train. At first he thought nothing of it, simply beginning his training after moving it to safety, assuming someone had left it there by mistake. (He didn’t think about how he was the only one who used this training ground, so far away and untouched). 

As he grew older the rose changed it’s place, though it was always there. Early on, once he figured out they were being left for  _him_ , he tried to figure out who was leaving them. He told Genma and Ebisu, and the only thing they could suggest was to see if anyone had bought roses at the flower shop recently. Unfortunately, no one had. 

When he was in his late teens and early twenties the roses seemed sicker. They weren’t as pristine as the previous years and sometimes there would be red on them where red shouldn’t be. Gai found himself worried about whoever it was who was leaving them, and tried once again to find out who the mystery person was and, once again, had no luck. (It was around this time that he saw Kakashi the least, but one day while trying to get him to come to things with his comrades he noticed a flowerless bush on his windowsill, stained with blood, though it didn’t really get much thought).

When he first got his genin team was the first time he had to explain the tradition, since the rose had appeared on their training ground before any of them had gotten there. It was odd, saying it aloud. A mysterious person awarding him a single token each year, yet never once leaving a clue as to who they were. The children immediately wanted to investigate, and while Gai praised their youthfulness, he declined. The mystery made it even better, after all.

When he and Kakashi finally became a couple (Gai thought it would surprise everybody, but it surprised no one) he told his eternal rival about it, wondering if he would do anything. The man had just shrugged, if they hadn’t shown their face all this time why would the bother now? Gai agreed with the logic, and when his birthday came around he showed his very important person the rose, who responded by handing him a box. It’s contents brought a smile to his face that threatened to break it.

It was a vase.

The mystery of the roses was never solved, but Gai wouldn’t have it any other way. And for as long as he lived they never stopped, though one year, later on in life, he almost didn’t find it, because he hadn’t thought to look on Hokage Mountain. He’d found it at sunset, the view moving him to tears, and he couldn’t help but think it had been planned that way.

—–

Every year after the war, Kakashi would leave a rose, because he had one friend left and wanted him to know how important he was, even if he didn’t show his face. He never stopped though, and he wouldn’t have hat it any other way.


	7. #7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompted to write a vacation fic, inspired by http://hatesasuke.tumblr.com/post/118380117220/hatesasuke-do-u-guys-read-boruto-or-do-you . Written July 10, 2015.

Gai had been the one to suggest it, something about ‘revisiting the springtime of youth’. Honestly Kakashi was fine with it the moment ‘vacation’ left his husband’s mouth.

It started when Kakashi complained about not really having anything to do now that he couldn’t exactly do missions and “Yes, it’s fine watching the children or teaching at the school but it’s just not something I want to do every single day”. It finished when Gai exclaimed from where he was doing pull-ups (strapped into the wheel chair, Kakashi should probably convince him to just do his own body weight soon) “Then we need a vacation!” And continued to list the ‘youthful benefits’ of such an escapade until he lowered himself down again. 

These events were followed by a lovely breakfast.

At the end of the week they headed out toward a nearby hotel complete with attached hot springs. Naruto was more than happy to agree to their ‘don’t contact unless it’s- you know what, just ask Shikamaru if it’s worth it’ condition. With that they were off, intent on enjoying themselves, and if Kakashi declined the offer to race to the hotel no one could blame him. 

It was about one and a half days of relaxation and (embarrassingly sappy) quality time. At one point Kakashi was concerned he might actually die of happiness- he wasn’t usually this sentimental, or emotional, something must be wrong with him. Either that or he was starting to really get comfortable with his old age. 

Regardless, he and Gai were enjoying themselves. Of course, it was right when he was ready to breath his final sigh of relief when fate remembered to take a shit on him (he didn’t care if he was being melodramatic, he felt justified).

He and Gai had been relaxing in the hot spring, enjoying each other’s company in a comfortable silence. Kakashi had even been close to dozing, having gradually slid to the side, his head landing on Gai’s shoulder. Then someone ran in, startling them both, seeming jittery.

“T-the Hokage is on the ph-phone for you, s-sir.” He would forgive the stutter since Kakashi was pretty sure he was giving the poor kid a death glare. 

Heaving the largest sigh in existence- and Gai laughed at him that jerk- Kakashi followed the poor staff member to the phone after putting on a robe. 

After the phone call he came back, grumbling under his breath about how he would never get any rest as long as those kids were still doing things. Gai kept laughing.

“Kakashi, it is their youth! Be glad they look to you for guidance!”

“Please tell them not to ask for my guidance while on vacation. How am I supposed to relax now, Gai? How?”

“Just like you were before, you can worry about this when we get back.”

“I can’t just- just ignore it!”

“Yes you can!”

“No, this is going to kill me. I’m going back.”

“Kakashi, you don’t have to do that, just come sit with me.”

“No, I need to go make sure they don’t burn down the village.”

“Kakashi…Babe…Dearest Rival…Honey….”

 

“At least help me out of here like a good husband.”


	8. They Always Know

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When you meet your soulmate- truly meet them, when they’re open with you- the world explodes in color. When they die, it returns to gray. No matter what, you’ll know. Written December 28, 2015. Gai's in a wheelchair again and blind Kakashi returns.

Kakashi was the first to notice, he was five and he didn’t say anything until he and his father had returned home.

“Hey. I need to go to the hospital, something’s wrong with my eyes.”

His father looked at him, confused and slightly taken aback, before he started laughing. 

“There’s nothing wrong, Kakashi, you’ve seen your soulmate!”

It took Sakumo another half an hour to both explain what this meant, and convince Kakashi that this was what had actually happened. He refused to believe anything like that could happen- he was five, how could he have already met his supposed ‘soulmate’. It wasn’t until Sakumo reminded him that he’d most likely fall in love with one of his fellow shinobi, and that they were probably in his class that Kakashi finally accepted it (albeit reluctantly). 

Sakumo then pulled out the book his parents had given him, full of colors and what their names were, because he’d long since started seeing gray again. 

When Kakashi asked why some colors had two names he really did take him to the hospital, and that’s when they found out he was colorblind. After that Kakashi didn’t think about it, or think about how he’d really only seen one new person that day. He had a war to worry about, after all. 

—

Gai didn’t notice until they were older, when he’d finally gotten Kakashi to accept a challenge- when he asked his dad why it had happened so late, he just shrugged, saying maybe he didn’t truly meet Kakashi until he’d acknowledged him. Gai accepted the answer wholeheartedly, asking then what all the things he suddenly saw were. 

When he saw Kakashi again he smiled, saying he looked much better in color. Kakashi just raised an eyebrow and looked away, saying they had bigger things to deal with. 

“Ah, so hip and cool! Nothing less to be expected from my eternal rival! But Kakashi, surely you see in color too, right?” 

He was curious, after all the first time they’d met had been so long ago, but Kakashi had never mentioned anything- could it be, did Kakashi not feel they’d truly met yet? 

“In a sense.” 

That was all the answer he got before he left again, and Gai didn’t see him again until after the war.

—

Kakashi didn’t want to think about what the flickering meant, during the war and once during his anbu days, when his sight would stutter between gray and the apparently few colors he saw. He blamed it on how Obito’s eye only saw gray, blamed it on the fact that his teammates were dead and so it would transfer over for a few seconds. 

He ignored the twisting in his gut, ignored how it always meant that, if he were at the village he would see Gai being hastily brought to the hospital. 

He ignored it like he always had. 

Except Gai kept talking to him, challenging him even though it was childish, he kept forcing himself into Kakashi’s life and at some point he couldn’t ignore it anymore. 

(He wouldn’t admit how much it scared him, how it added another nightmare to his pile, how despite himself he was happy sometimes, even if he didn’t deserve it.)

Eventually he stopped trying to push Gai away, it was too hard, he would just come back doubling his efforts. So when the Hokage suggests he teach instead of continue with the anbu, he accepts without much resistance.

And if the world seems a little brighter when Gai smiles at the news, he keeps that to himself. 

—

Gai was out of the village when it happened, when Pain attacked. He and his team were on a mission, they didn’t even know about it until they arrived. 

Gai knew though. 

They were on the way back when his vision flickered- he couldn’t help the twisting of his gut, but he had gotten too used to it to really believe it was anything beyond a close call. Except then it didn’t stop flickering, and it took longer and longer to turn back. 

When it didn’t go back he stopped so suddenly his students didn’t notice until they were 100 feet ahead. He didn’t register their concerned calls, instead he stared in horror at a world that refused to turn back to the bright and beautiful one he’d grown accustomed to. 

It wasn’t until Lee had backtracked, worried and asking what was wrong that he forced himself out of it. There would be time to grieve later, but now more than ever they needed to return to the village. 

“It’s nothing, I though I saw something but it was just a trick of light! Come, we must hurry back to the village and beat our record!” 

He dashed ahead, focusing on the strain his legs felt instead of the feeling of crumbling and withering inside his chest. 

—

When he woke up Kakashi was alone, still surrounded by rubble and everything felt too bright. He groaned, standing up and looking around as others did the same. He’d definitely died, that was for sure, and he was seeing many others he knew had died. He wanted to know what happened, but for now he saw people who were stuck, and he went over to help. 

Maybe they would know what had happened. 

Kakashi and those who had ‘woken up’ around him made their way to the front of the village, where it seemed most people were gathering. None of them were injured, but they were strangely sore and tired, though he supposed that dying would take a lot out of you. 

He saw that others had done the same as they had, and everyone seemed to be wondering what had happened. At least he wasn’t the only clueless one. He was looking for Naruto- he always seemed to be in the middle of things, somehow- when he was suddenly engulfed by what seemed like a large, green projectile. 

Said projectile was also openly crying. 

“Gai?”

Kakashi was quiet, suddenly realizing what exactly it meant that he had died, and that even if he was somehow alive right now there was no doubt about it. Gai didn’t say anything back, he just hugged him harder and buried his head in Kakashi’s shoulder, no doubt leaving a large wet stain that he couldn’t get himself to care about. 

Kakashi wrapped one arm around him, the other hand resting on the back of Gai’s head. 

“Sorry.”

—

Gai never truly got over the shock of that day, but he learned to live with it again, the flashes in his vision. They all had to, after all, they were shinobi. But there would always be that split second when he remembered that horrible reality, where Kakashi was truly dead and he hadn’t even been there. 

Still, they continue on their missions, continue their lives. They rebuild the village, they find a new hokage, more problems rise, more problems are solved. 

Even so, sometimes, in the dead of night when he’s not so exhausted to drop into sleep he thought about it. He wondered what would have happened, if Pain (or whoever that guy ended up being) hadn’t decided to bring them all back. If he had ended up living the rest of his days in a gray world, a constant reminder that he’d failed to protect his most important person. 

It was better during the day, when everything was colorful and he had things to do, when he could challenge his rival and enjoy the moment. It was better when he was out training or on a mission, when he returned home so exhausted that he slept soundly through the night. 

Life continued though, and so did he. Ever the optimist, he started to change the nature of a few of his challenges, and he knew that for all of his complaining Kakashi enjoyed it when he dared him to have a nice dinner. 

They continued like that, happily, or at least as happy as shinobi could be when a war was looming on the horizon and almost nothing seemed to be going right.

—

Kakashi fought in a second war, yet it was so much harder to fight in this one. He was stronger, yes, but last time he ignored everything but the war. Now he couldn’t do that, he’d lived too much life to ignore it again. 

Maybe that’s why he was made a general. 

It didn’t matter by the end, the enemies just kept getting stronger, it was getting ridiculous, how were they expected to fight against that?

Then Gai looked at him, a split second of apology in his eyes and Kakashi wanted to shout, to grab him, to do something to stop him but he knew it was their best bet. 

So he couldn’t do anything as Gai opened the eighth gate. Only his world didn’t flicker between color and gray like it usually did, instead it did something worse. For one split second it seemed like the earth exploded, it seemed like everything was on fire and he was seeing things he was never meant to see. Then it grew dim, back to normal, but it didn’t stop. It kept growing dimmer and dimmer. It was only a few shades away from complete gray when Naruto did…whatever it was he did. He didn’t have time to think about it too much though, about the godly powers both he and Sasuke had gotten, how so many things were happening at once and none of it was believable. 

He was just trying to make sure his students stayed alive. 

. 

When it was over, finally over, Kakashi found Gai. He was still barely alive, but his vision had given way to the now familiar flickering, and it was slowly taking longer and longer between spots of gray. He knew he should count himself lucky, because some people had died and they weren’t going to come back this time. 

He sat next to Gai’s bed, leaning against the tent pole because they couldn’t move him to the village, not yet, he needed to be more stable. Kakashi was told multiple times to go to the village, to get administrative stuff done, but when had he ever done any of that stuff on time? Not for years, and today sure as hell wasn’t going to be the day that changed.

Instead he took sporadic catnaps, one hand reached across the gap and barely touching Gai’s bandaged one, waking up whenever there was any movement in the tent. It was never the kind of movement he was waiting for, though. 

—

The last thing Gai could remember was the searing pain pushing past his limits, destroying him as it made it’s way through his body. A scrap of thought, one half of an apology went through his mind before he fell into oblivion, wondering if death was just a black abyss, wondering if this was what Kakashi had seen. 

Which is why, when he woke up, he couldn’t understand where he was. He stared at the ceiling of a tent, his whole body strangely numb and he didn’t feel like he could move. What had happened? Why was he alive? He’d opened the eighth gate, he should be dead right now. 

Well, if he was alive then he should at least look at something other than what was immediately above him, figure out what was happening. It took an embarrassing amount of effort to turn his head, and it took longer than it ever had in his entire life. Finally he could see something other than the ceiling. 

He first noticed a bandaged hand- his, he realized- lying motionless by his side. Then he noticed another one, first seeing another similarly bandaged finger, following it until the arm trailed out of his vision, seeing the glimpse of a familiar tuft of hair out of the corner of his eye. 

He tried to say his name, a simple “Kakashi” but all that came out was a somewhat raspy, vaguely audible rush of air. Luckily that did the trick, since the hand darted out of his line of sight and he heard a quick breath, and then Kakashi’s face was in front of his, eyes somehow both normal- how was that possible?- and both wider than he’d seen them in years. 

And then he smiles and a few tears leak out from his eyes, soaked up by the cloth of his mask as they fall and it finally hits Gai that he’s alive, he has no idea how, but he was alive and that was all that mattered. 

So he tried to smile as best as he could (though he wasn’t sure it worked, considering his face was as numb as the rest of him) and wished he could wipe away the tears on Kakashi’s face. 

—

There were still flickers, close calls that got few and fewer as they grew older and started teaching more than going out on missions. Kakashi had never expected to live this long, and it was clear Gai definitely hadn't. But they’d somehow, miraculously, made it out alive. 

That didn’t mean they’d made it out unscathed. Gai was in a wheelchair, and despite the heal job Naruto had done, Kakashi’s eyesight went quickly. Gai didn’t realize how bad it was until he asked him which of two sweaters looked better, because after the first diagnosis from Tsunade that it wasn’t something they could stop Kakashi hadn’t really mentioned it and his other senses more than made up for the gradual loss of eye sight. 

They lived, they adjusted, they adapted. They helped raise the next generation of shinobi. Sometimes they still thought about it, the times when the world went gray, and how eventually that would happen again. Gai had laughed once. 

“You wouldn’t know, now, unless we were in the same room.”

“No, I’d know right away.”

“Really? But you only see black, dear.”

“I’d know.”

Gai couldn’t find it in himself to doubt him.


	9. #9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Domestic AU, wedding planning gone wrong ft. colorblind Kakashi. Written December 29, 2015.

Gai groaned, wondering when flowers had gotten so complicated. Even he was having trouble staying energetic when he was three hours into going through an endless procession of possible flower arrangements with no end in sight. Excusing himself politely, he practically ran outside, breathing in the fresh, blissfully aroma free air. Then he sighed and took out his phone, feeling like he was admitting defeat as he held it up to his ear.

It took a few rings before a familiar voice answered, laced with sleep,

“Hello?”

Gai gulped, not wanting to request what he was about to ask. He’d promised he could take care of today, after all. His beloved had been running on fumes lately, and deserved a nice, relaxing day. Still, they had to keep to schedule, and the flowers would take who knows how much longer.

“Kakashi!…I’m sorry to ask you this, but could you, uh, go down to meet with the wedding planner about the color schemes? I’m still meeting with the florist.”

The sound of ruffling sheets drifted through the phone, probably Kakashi sitting up.

“You’re still there? Didn’t you meet them this morning?”

Gai cringed, not wanting to admit how hard it turned out flower picking had ended up.

“I…well, it’s been taking…quite a long time.”

There was a sigh, quiet, the kind that usually came from his rival when he had to wake up but really did not want to. Gai almost took it back, insisted he could do it, even though there was no possible way that was happening.

“Alright. I’ll probably finish faster than you would have, anyway.”

Gai frowned at the comment- the only reasons the flowers were taking so long was because they had to be perfect! Did Kakashi mean he wouldn’t deliberate over every possible color scheme? He shook his head, how could he doubt his fiancé like that?

“Thank you, Kakashi! I will certainly make it up to you!”

“There’s no need for that, just don’t spend the night debating over flowers.”

He would have retorted had Kakashi’s voice not been laced with the humor and fondness Gai was used to. He smiled again happily, feeling much better than he had at the beginning.

“I wouldn’t dream of it! See you tonight, I love you!”

There was a chuckle from the other line, a returned ‘love you too’, and then Gai was back in with the florist. Now more than ever he was determined to pick the best possible flowers, not only visually, but aromatically as well, considering how sensitive his love’s nose was.

That night, he bought dinner from the restaurant he knew was Kakashi’s favorite and he received a kiss in thanks. That was the last he thought about the color scheme, until the reception rehearsal.

“Kakashi…why are all the colors so…”

Gai couldn’t finish the sentence. Everyone was there, and all but Kakashi were staring in horror around them. The wedding planner looked extremely nervous, not making eye contact with anyone.

Kakashi looked at him, his visible eyebrow raised.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

That was the moment that everyone collectively remembered Kakashi was colorblind.


	10. #10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Boy Next Door AU. It takes ten years for them to get a clue.

Gai and Kakashi had lived next to each since second grade- even though Kakashi should have been in kindergarten, age wise. Gai and his father had gone to welcome the family when they moved in the week before school started. Sakumo had been very friendly and nice, whereas Kakashi had only spoken to them when Sakumo told him to “say hi to the new neighbors, son”. 

Gai would not be deterred though, and when he discovered Kakashi would not only be going to the same school as him, but joining the fencing studio right next to his kickboxing studio he insisted Kakashi show him around everywhere. This led to Sakumo and Dai taking their children around town while Gai ‘led’ them on an ‘adventure’. 

When Kakashi proved how much of a genius he was on the first day of school was the same moment that Gai declared that they were “eternal rivals!”. No matter what Kakashi said to the contrary after that could dissuade him. 

It wasn’t until fifth grade when Kakashi finally accepted one of Gai’s ‘challenges’ - once Kakashi had started branching out to more fighting styles, Gai had grown even more insistent that they train with each other. 

(“We’re rivals, Kakashi! We must sharpen each others’ skills!”  
“Funny, I thought we were neighbors.”)

Kakashi accepts his challenges more regularly through their middle school years, mainly, Gai thinks, because they no longer go to the same school. Kakashi had been accepted to one of the private schools in the area that was both a high school and a middle school- the Anbu Academy- while Gai continued going to the public school with most of the rest of their classmates. 

It isn’t until they’re in high school that they spend more time together as friends than as rivals. Kakashi doesn’t give Gai any reasons about his change in behavior, about his sudden tolerance. Dai suggests, quietly, when Gai is complaining about how his rival “never just says what he’s thinking, it’s annoying!” that maybe he was just lonely, that even if he spent all his time on schoolwork and training he would still be reminded of the fact that he’s the only one in the house. 

After that Gai made sure to either go over to Kakashi’s house everyday, or invite him over to his. Sakumo had…died when they were in middle school, so Gai hadn’t really heard much about it, but when he imagines his father dying it brings tears to his eyes. So Gai makes sure Kakashi knows he still has a family with them, and as they grow he sees his eternal rival- no, they will never be “too old” for that term- open up more, even start joking around and acting like an actual teenager, not just a prodigy. 

That was when Gai started seeing Kakashi as more of his best friend than his rival. They went to different schools, they were pursuing different interests, the only part of their lives he could consider Kakashi his rival in anymore was in martial arts, and Gai was (proudly) a match for him in that respect. 

It wasn’t until they were juniors when he heard some people talking, to the side in the hallway during a passing period- they were sophomores, he thought. 

“What about him? Isn’t he a junior?”

Gai realized they were pointing at him, he wondered if they were referring to his feats in the wrestling club. 

“No, he’s definitely already dating someone. Haven’t you noticed how someone always picks him up on a motorcycle?”

This was getting increasingly awkward.

“Why do you know that?”

“Because it’s a cool bike.”

Gai didn’t think about that for the rest of the day, chocking it up to childish underclassmen.

However, when Kakashi picked him up that day after school, asking if he wanted to stop somewhere to eat, Gai for once wondered if it really did look like a romantic relationship to other people. 

He was also surprised that he didn’t seem to mind the thought. He decided not to mention it, and they continued about their lives in a relatively happy peace. Gai never mentioned what he’d overheard, and if Kakashi ever heard or thought anything like it, he didn’t mention it either. 

That brought them to senior year, they were both busy with colleges and tests to do much of what they’d been used to last year. Oftentimes, Kakashi would stay after at his school, working on one project or another, and Gai was putting extra effort into his club activities- after all, he really needed to get a sports scholarship. 

To his surprise, Kakashi was the one who finally brought it up (not that Gai had been thinking about it). 

“It kind of sucks that we can’t hang out as often this year.”

“Yes, but worry not, rival! Our friendship will not be so easily shaken! It has been forged through our blood and sweat!”

“Gai the only blood that was ever spilt was the time we had a cooking challenge and you fucked up slicing carrots.”

“Uh…nevertheless…”

“Anyway, what I meant was I didn’t think I’d miss it so much.”

“Miss what, Kakashi?”

Kakashi shrugged from where he was sprawled out on the floor of Gai’s room, leaning against the bed and writing an essay. Gai was lying on the bed, throwing a ball at the ceiling, catching it, and then repeating. 

“Just, hanging out.”

“We’re hanging out right now, Kakashi!”

“No, I mean…nevermind.”

Gai stopped throwing the ball, frowning and sitting up. Not only was he curious, he was surprised Kakashi wouldn’t tell him- if Kakashi had something to say, he always said it, he never stopped halfway through.

“Tell me.”

Kakashi leaned forward and looked back at him, face as hard to read as usual. His eyes closed for a few seconds as he seemed to be thinking something over, then he sighed.

Setting his computer to the side he stood up, sitting next to Gai on the bed and looking briefly out the window before speaking.

“I’ve been thinking about…rumors, that used to go around a lot.”

Gai frowned harder, confused now more than ever.

“What sort of rumors?”

“You’ve heard at least some, haven’t you?”

“I try to concern myself with what is certain, my rival.”

Kakashi gave a laugh, relaxing somewhat as he went on. 

“Well, I’ve just been thinking about them, and how I would feel if they were true.”

Gai propped himself up on his elbows, frustrated that Kakashi wasn’t just getting to the point.

“Just say whatever you have to say, Kakashi, I won’t judge.”

Kakashi sighed, turning and flopping back on the bed next to Gai, looking up at him. 

“It’s not that I think you’ll judge, I just don’t really think it’s worth saying.”

“Hah! When has that ever stopped anyone but you from saying something?” 

Gai lay back down, arms going behind his head and looking over at Kakashi.

“That’s not really something to boast, Gai.”

“I don’t care, just spill it.”

“Well…hm, I guess.”

Gai realized this was the first time he’d ever known Kakashi to take this long saying anything. He wondered what could possibly be so hard for him to say.

“Just say it, Kakashi, live in the moment! That’s the spirit of youth!”

Kakashi stared at him for another moment before letting out a breath and looking back at the ceiling.

“I mean…I wouldn’t mind being in a relationship…”

Gai looked at him, confused by his blush and averted eyes of his friend.

“…with you…”

Gai blinked in surprise, sitting up quickly and looking down at Kakashi, who was resolutely staring out the window. A grin spread across his face as he saw Kakashi’s blush grow.

“Are you saying…you _like_  me, Kakashi?” 

Kakashi looked at him, and Gai could have sworn he was pouting if he didn’t know the ‘great, serious Kakashi’ didn’t pout. He laughed again, flicking the other boy’s nose. 

“That’s good then! Because,”

He coughed, putting on his best serious face and doing his best Kakashi voice impression.

“I wouldn’t mind being in a relationship with _you_ , either.” 

He broke his serious facade to smile again, this time finally getting Kakashi to look at him, relief and surprise in his eyes. 

“Oh. That’s…that’s good then.” 

Gai laughed, laying back down next to him and turning on his side, 

“Of course it is, Ka. Ka. Shi!”

Kakashi was blushing again, putting one arm up over his eyes, but Gai knew he was smiling. Gai lay back down on his back, finding Kakashi’s free hand with his own, a content smile settling on his face. Kakashi huffed again, curling his fingers around Gai’s hand, not removing his arm from his eyes. 

“Yeah.”

 


	11. Lifeline

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A mission goes south and Kakashi and Gai are left gravely injured in enemy territory. They give it their all to get to safety, but is it enough to stay alive?  
> Some blood mentioned but nothing graphic. Written April 10, 2016.

_A flash of red. Screams, of pain, of exhilaration- no, desperation was closer. Pain and strength at the same time, each time he moved he felt everything, felt the unbearable strain of his body, felt another body break under his blows. Then they’re gone, he’s falling, the strength disappearing and the pain growing, darkness edging in. **  
**_

_He hears a panicked shout, tastes a mixture of blood and soil, feels his body collide harshly with the ground before it all blacks out._

When Gai woke up he was first aware that he was moving, but he wasn’t walking. He was also painfully, extremely, tired. Right- he’d opened the gates even after he’d depleted most of his chakra and stamina, but Kakashi hadn’t been faring any better, and if that wasn’t the time to go all out, then what was? Admittedly, he hadn’t opened all of them, but he’d opened as many as he could force himself through, and it was enough to defeat their enemies.

With that remembered, he realized Kakashi was carrying him (how? Wasn’t he injured worse than Gai was?). One arm was behind, supporting Gai, holding him up as if he were sitting. The other held both of Gai’s arms over his shoulders, confusingly. Wouldn’t it be easier if both hands were behind? Gai’s weight and gravity would keep him leaning against Kakashi’s back, and that way one arm wasn’t doing all the work.

They stopped moving, Kakashi standing on a tree branch, then moving quickly to the other side of the trunk. The hand around Gai’s wrists tightened, one finger pressed where someone would check for a pulse.

_Oh. That’s why._

Kakashi stilled, holding his breath for a tense moment before releasing it, sighing in quiet relief as whatever perceived danger passed. He didn’t move for another moment, though, releasing Gai’s arms to steady himself against the tree, grunting and swaying slightly. If Gai hadn’t been so close to passing out again, he would have gripped Kakashi himself, instinctively afraid of falling. Everything went black again as the hand went back to his wrists and Kakashi continued to make his way through the forest.

When he woke up again it was night, and even when Gai opened his eyes he could only vaguely make out basic shapes- it was a new moon, and he could only see a few stars past whatever was above them as a makeshift shelter.  

“Ah, you’re awake for real this time.”

Kakashi came into view, his white hair standing out oddly in the dark night. He held something out in front of him, waiting for Gai to take it- he only then realized he was propped up against something, and that his limbs felt unbelievably heavy and sore, despite the fact that he knew he didn’t have his weights on.

Kakashi sighed quietly, scooting closer slowly, pressing the food pellet to his mouth.

“Eat it. We have to keep moving.”

Gai knew there was nothing to be ashamed of about it, but he still felt a his face flush in embarrassment as he was fed. He tried to speak, but his throat was dry and his tongue felt swollen. He managed a cough that did nothing to help his thirst.

“Here, drink slowly.”

Once Gai had gotten enough water to speak again (though it didn’t really satisfy him) he spoke.

“Kakashi…”

He stopped himself, not sure what to say. There were a million things he wanted to ask- the first one being how Kakashi was managing considering his injuries before Gai blacked out- but he kept them back, knowing they wouldn’t help the situation or the worry that kept gnawing at his gut.

“How far?”

Kakashi turned back toward him after drinking some water himself and putting it away.

“About two more days in enemy territory, then another half’a day till we get close enough to an outpost to be found…It’d be easy, usually, but…”

Gai nodded, looking down. Kakashi didn’t need to finish that last part, they both knew how slim their chances of surviving got with each passing second. As much as Gai was holding back from asking questions, he knew that his rival was also holding back from commenting on what Gai had done. He wasn’t sure if he was grateful for it or not.

He watched as Kakashi took a handful of the pellets and dumped them in his mouth, mask held down for a brief moment to complete the action and then secured back in place. Gai would have been happy about being trusted that much if it weren’t for the situation.

“We need to keep moving.”

He looked at the other in surprise.

“Kakashi, you can’t possibly-”

“It doesn’t matter, the more time we waste, the more likely it is we won’t be able to keep going.”

Gai held back his protests as Kakashi picked him up again, the same hold as before. It was another half an hour of jumping through the trees before he fell unconscious again, Kakashi’s hand a comforting presence against his wrist.

The next time he woke up was midday, leaning against the rough bark of a tree, a river running noisily nearby. He blinked himself awake, surprised and worried that Kakashi had already made it that far- there was only one river nearby, and by nearby he meant ‘between where the started and where they were going’. And though they did have to cross it twice, it was a little farther than they should have been at- why was Kakashi going at such a cut throat pace?

Kakashi approached where he was sitting through the foliage, leaves rustling quietly as he did. Gai breathed in quickly, surprised, now that he saw Kakashi in sunlight. Most of his wounds from the fight were bandaged (and now that Gai thought about it, so were his), but there was a streak of smudged, drying blood going down his cheek, a morbid tear path.

“That…wasn’t there before, was it, Kakashi?” He asked, quietly, knowing what a new wound would mean but refusing to believe it was the truth.

“It’s fine.”

“That’s not what I asked.”

Kakashi didn’t respond again, instead placing the water next to him and more food pellets into his hand.

“We don’t have much time left.”

Gai frowned, reluctantly taking the food and water (he was glad he could do it himself, though). He knew what that sentence really meant. “I don’t have much time left to get us to safety”, and Gai would be useless if they faced the enemy again- which they likely had, based on Kakashi’s eye.

He finished the water, handing it over, mind racing. He hadn’t woken up, so either he was sleeping very heavily, or there hadn’t been an actual fight- maybe Kakashi hadn’t really faced an enemy…no, he would have said that outright if he hadn’t. The best Gai could hope was that Kakashi had simply used his sharingan to avoid or escape the enemy, and that had been what caused the trail of blood.

Kakashi put the water away again before slowly standing up. He was facing away from Gai, looking out into the distance at a point he couldn’t see.

“We need to leave.”

It was then that Gai noticed the tension in his shoulders. When he picked him up once again (one day he would repay him for this, then he wouldn’t feel so ashamed of himself) Gai saw the expression on his rival’s face- panic. He wasn’t able to ask before they were moving again, but he knew that if they didn’t make it soon…the enemy would overtake them, and the coil of worry that tightened in his stomach was enough to silence even his most optimistic thoughts.

He didn’t remember falling back asleep, but by the time he woke up it was night again, and they were still moving. Gai felt the hand gripping his wrist again, then he felt it slip, and Gai clung to Kakashi on instinct as he stumbled, falling for a few terrifying seconds before Kakashi caught a branch above them, the arm supporting Gai trembling as they swung forward with the momentum, Kakashi using it to propel them forward onto a lower branch farther ahead.

Kakashi swayed, dropping to a kneel as he caught his breath. He mumbled to himself, to low for Gai to make out anything beyond the angry tone. He straightened up, stilling for a moment before returning his hand to secure Gai’s wrists. Gai frowned, grabbing Kakashi’s wrist in return, surprising him enough to stop him for a moment.

“Kakashi…”

“We need to keep moving.”

“You need to rest, or we won’t make it.”

“We’re close, but not as close as they are to us. It won’t matter how rested I get if we’re dead.”

Gai frowned, emotions creating a storm in his head, anger, frustration, fear, anxiety. Underneath it all dread curled up in his stomach, an omen he couldn’t seem to shake, and the fact that they had pursuers didn’t help it at all.

He couldn’t say anything as Kakashi continued to move after that, but he didn’t like it. He liked even less how he was able to stay conscious for longer now, and during the time he was awake Kakashi stumbled three more times before he was finally convinced to at least stop for water and food. He fell back asleep moments after he finished drinking the water, noticing, absurdly, that at some point Kakashi had switched which arm supported him and which secured his arms, the supporting arm going from right to left. He couldn’t think farther on the point, though, before he fully succumbed to sleep.

_“Gai…Gai! Wake up…you have to-”_

_“Shit…Gai, wake up, I can’t…”_

_“Wake up! Dammit…Gai…”_

_“I’m sorry.”_

_No…he was trying, but he couldn’t get past the fog around his mind. What was he hearing? Kakashi? What was happening? Why couldn’t he wake up all the way…unconsciousness was better than this horrible limbo._

_Screams, he couldn’t identify whose. Thuds, sickening and familiar, heavy breathing getting farther away._

_The sound of a thousand birds, all chirping at once._

_Silence, then, breathing, closer, labored, a stumbling, failing step._

_“G..ai…”_

_He heard another thud, closer this time, air brushing his fingertips._

Gai finally managed to force himself to full consciousness. The first thing he was aware of was the rough ground digging into the side of his face, how uncomfortably he was laying on top of his arm. Then it was the smells- the dirt, then the blood, and then the smell of burnt skin, strong enough that he almost retched then and there, lying against the ground. When he opened his eyes (or eye, since he would get an eye full of dirt if he opened both) he didn’t see anything, not at first. The only light he had to see by was the first dredges of dawn, the smallest sliver of the moon, and the few stars that made it past the trees above them. He could only hear the sound of the river nearby and his own breathing.

His own breathing.

Not Kakashi’s.

He shot up, immediately swaying, a hand shooting out wildly and hitting a tree before he could steady himself. He looked around, fear combining with dehydration and the still fresh smell of charred flesh to make his stomach roil violently.

Gai grit his teeth, ignoring it as he squinted, trying to see. He could make out the vague shapes of what he assumed was the enemy further away. His eyes widened, understanding hitting him as he thought back to Kakashi’s refusal to rest- there’d been no possibility of survival. He was shocked they were alive at all, neither of them was in any shape to defeat more than one opponent, much less four.

A pang of…not fear, something worse than that…horror shot through him as reality hit him, that they should be dead but instead the enemy was. He looked around again, desperate, tears welling up in his eyes when he had yet to spot Kakashi- no way was he with those other shapes, no way.

He still couldn’t hear his rival’s breaths.

He let out a ragged gasp, shutting his useless eyes, bunching up handfuls of earth. He had given his all too early, if it just meant he was dead weight, that he was the reason his best friend had…

That his most important person had…

He went to pull his hands up to his face, to wipe away the tears spilling out of his eyes, but stopped in shock. His fingers had brushed…something. He’d been so focused…

He’d been so focused on looking at the battlefield, on looking far away, that he hadn’t considered that Kakashi would have gotten back to him.

Gai looked down, the shock of white hair, grimy with dirt and blood as it was, standing out in the almost-darkness. Kakashi was collapsed next to him, face down in the dirt. Gai was quick to turn him over, hands shaking in a combination of disbelief and the exhaustion that he still couldn’t seem to shake.

He still couldn’t tell if he was breathing, though, and another spike of fear shot through him, almost enough to dash the fragile hope that had started to grow. He fumbled around, still not able to see more than a vague shape, finally grasping Kakashi’s hand in both of his own.

He gasped quietly, a static shock running through him. Then he felt the charred remains of bandages crumble away as he disturbed them, falling to the ground. He gulped, stomach knotting as he gripped Kakashi’s wrist, waiting, begging to feel a pulse there. He didn’t ease his hold until he felt a heartbeat flutter against his fingertips, weak but alive. Gai breathed a sigh of relief, lowering the other’s hand back to the ground.

His relief ended when their situation hit him. Gai gulped, looking back at Kakashi’s still form. What was he supposed to do?

_“I’m sorry.”_

Determination flooded through him. Kakashi had done his best- he’d done more than that. So would Gai. He wouldn’t let them die, not when they were so close. If they were where he thought the were- and he had no doubt Kakashi would have stayed on course no matter what- then they just had to cross the river and go a little farther, then they would be close enough to be found by a patrol.

Gai set his jaw, testing his legs. He could move them- he had to move them. But he wasn’t sure how far he would be able to get. He shook his head; that didn’t matter, once his legs gave out, he’d crawl if he had to, and drag Kakashi along with him. Whatever happened, he wouldn’t give up.

Standing up was more painful than he’d expected, and his vision temporarily blacked out once he was upright. Gai grit his teeth, bending over to pick up Kakashi- maybe, if he opened the first gate, then he could make a dead sprint as far as he could before his legs gave out again.

Kakashi’s hand grasped his as Gai began to pick him up, causing him to jolt in surprise.

“K-Kakashi?”

“Don’t.”

“What? Don’t what?”

“You were thinking…out loud.”

“Y-you were awake?”

“Barely. Gai, you can’t, it won’t work.”

“Then I’ll just do it without the gates.”

“Gai…”

“I’ll get us to safety, don’t worry, Kakashi!”

…

“Kakashi?”

He’d lost consciousness, his weak grip on Gai’s hand failing altogether, completely limp in his hold. He wasn’t sure how far he’d be able to make it, but that didn’t matter. He just had to make it far enough.

Everything after that passed in a blur, which was a good thing, since it was all Gai could do to ignore the pain that started creeping through him and force himself to continue moving. He held Kakashi with both arms supporting him, but every now and then one would reach up, almost without him thinking about it, to check that the pulse was still there, that dead weight was just an expression.

The next real, non-hazy instant was when he collapsed, hopefully far enough away from the river that they would be found, and by allies. Lucky for them, Gai was good at hope, so he hid them from the sight of the river and hoped they’d be found in time.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Gai woke up in a hospital bed covered in bandages, limbs even heavier than when he’d first woken up after the fight. He was disoriented at first, and it was a few moments before understanding made his entire body relax in relief. Finally, they were safe.

Or at least, the part of his brain he really didn’t like pointed out, he was safe. Gai was alone in the hospital room, no sign of Kakashi anywhere. He pushed back the panic that started to crawl up his throat. He was probably just in another room, and once a nurse came it would be simple to ask.

All he had to do was fight his heavy eyelids for that long. It was nothing- it was like training! Training to stay awake.

Still, he was almost asleep when someone entered his room, jolting him awake. He didn’t recognize them, so he wasn’t in Konoha, but they had a leaf symbol on their headband, so they hadn’t been picked up by the enemy.

“Ah, sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you, I’m just here to make sure everything is alright.”

Gai nodded as the nurse checked his IV- how had he not noticed it? Then remembered why he’d been fighting sleep in the first place.

“Ka-er…my friend, is he alright?” His voice was quieter than he would’ve liked, it made him sound vulnerable.

The nurse seemed to be taking an awfully long time checking the IV and not looking at him.

“He’s…alive, but…” The nurse hesitated before sighing and continuing, “His chakra was past normal depletion, and one of his wounds was badly infected. We cleaned it, but he’s still got a high fever.” The nurse finally turned to him, “Until he stabilizes, we won’t know.”

Gai stared, fingers gripping his sheets so tight that his knuckles were white.

“I need to see him.”

“He hasn’t woken up, and you’re both very weak, I don’t think-”

“I need to see him.”

“…Alright, but if you disturb him I won’t bring you in again.”

Gai didn’t say anything else as he was helped into a wheelchair and taken to Kakashi’s room. He would usually try to be even more boisterous in hospitals, the fragile air always felt so full of tension that he couldn’t stand it’s silences. Now, though, he let it hang around him heavily as they went to a door a few rooms over.

Gai’s eyebrows scrunched together when he saw his best friend lying there, motionless. He fought back the tears he usually let flow freely, wishing Kakashi would miraculously sit up and announce it was all prank, a joke, that he wasn’t really on the edge of death even now that they were safe. He was wheeled over to sit next to him, the nurse excusing themselves and leaving, closing the door with a gentle click.

He reached down and pushed the wheels until he was up against the bed, elbows resting on the edge of the blanket. Kakashi had two IVs hooked up, but there was no machine softly beeping, reminding him of his friend’s heartbeat.

Suddenly he couldn’t stand the absence of the usually annoying machine, and he reached forward and grabbed Kakashi’s hand. One of his hands held the other’s bandaged one, the other hand lightly wrapping around the wrist. He gave one final sigh of relief when he felt the pulse there, and suddenly his vision was blurry with tears, his breath growing harsh as he failed to stem the flow.

The hand he was holding twitched, and Gai looked up to see Kakashi blinking drowsily, eyes slowly focusing on him. Gai smiled even as he continued to cry, glad to see his friend awake.

“You’re crying.”

“Y-yeah.”

Kakashi looked around sluggishly, then back at him.

“We’re…safe?”

“Yeah, so don’t worry anymore.”

“You too, then.”

“What?”

Kakashi’s hand turned in his own, fingers straightening out under his wrist and feeling the pulse there.

“Don’t worry…Gai.”

Gai huffed a laugh.

“I never did.”

“You’re a bad liar.”

He blinked back the last few tears, finally stopping the flow.

“Sorry.”

Kakashi sighed, closing his eyes again.

“I’m tired.”

“You can sleep, get some rest.”

“You too.”

“Yeah, we’ll talk later.”

“Later…Gai.”

Gai fell asleep after Kakashi, his head pillowed on his arms, Kakashi’s hand still in his own, the steady heartbeat reassuring him as he closed his eyes.


End file.
